Paddy and his two friends are talking at work.His first friend says:"I think my wife is having an affair with the electrician.The other day I came home and found wire cutters under our bed and they weren't mine."
His second friend says:"I think my wife is having an affair with the plummer the other day I found a wrench under the bed and it wasn't mine."
Paddy says:"I think my wife is having an affair with a horse." Both his friendds look at him with utter disbelief. "No I'm serious.The other day I came home and found a jockey under our bed."
This man was sitting quietly reading his paper one morning, peacefully enjoying himself, when his wife sneaks up behind him and whacks him on the back of his head with a huge frying pan.
He asks, "What was that for?"
She replies, "What was that piece of paper in your pants pocket with the name Marylou written on it?"
He says, "Oh honey, remember two weeks ago when I went to the horse races? Marylou was the name of one of the horses I bet on."
She is appeased and goes off to work around the house. Three days later he is once again sitting in his chair reading and she repeats the frying pan swatting.
He says, "What's that for this time?"
She answered, "Your horse called."
Joe Palmer, the late racing expert, told about a man from Idaho who breezed into Kentucky with a six-year-old horse that had never raced before, but which he entered for a race.
The horse won easily and paid a whopping price. The racing stewards did not like the look of the thing and questioned the owner.
"Is this horse unsound?" they asked. "Not a bit," said the owner.
"In that case," asked the stewards, "why have you never raced him before?"
"Mister," said the man from Idaho, "we couldn't even catch the critter until he was five years old."